When the best interest of both parents is actually attempted at being met at all? Ive felt the same emotions as you, still feel a lot of them. I never thought Id be in a situation like this myself. I can barely pay my rent at $600/month for the 2 bdrm Im required to have to continue my visitation schedule. I work hard to sustain my lifestyle and to take care of my child. The system needs Common Sense Reform. Lawyers? Its about whats best for the child. Agree with Bob Grise. But it costed me a lot of money to get proof and to go to court those 5 times, and in the end Im still paying. Without going into a lot of detail, I had it pretty bad with support and other divorce obligations. Why does it matter how much the mothers salary is? I did NOT include rent, extracurricular activities, cell phone bill, or clothing. General Attorney office is a joke, and yes the system is full broken. when BOTH parents want custody) mothers win full custody about 75% of the time. And my 3 are the oldest. What do I say? I sat down and crunched the numbers concerning the monthly expenses for raising my 2 boys, and let me tell you, my ex is getting off easy. In many cases jail is actually better from some men if they are young enough and physically big. Please support reform laws in your state and at the federal level! But I feel that it should be fair. After the deductions come out of my check (60%) and I pay my bills I am left with $360 a month for gas, groceries, and entertainment for the kids. You dont own them. The one whom receives Child Support receives it Tax Free. But not when it has varifilable proof that the fathers income has gone down . WTF?!?! His wife harrassed me nonstop all hours of the night, because she was a bartender who needed to emotionally abuse someone and I was her favorite victim. the country needs to adopt no child support in majority of cases. Thats why its not going to change because nobody does anything about it because it afends people who think your ex deserves half of your check because the government uses you as a scape goat so they dont have to pay for anything so they make you pay a ridiculous amount so that ex is satisfied and wont ask for anymore hand outs. Dont be afraid, make sure that the powers that be, the judge, understands that you are not in agreement of any order that violates your rights as a human being, that is, your right to parent your child as you see fit. and your civil rights are being violated and definitely hire an attorney. Just because we divorced does not make him less of their father. I was raised with the notion that if you dont set expectations that anticipate some results, then dont be shocked when the output is shabby. I just came back from war when all of this was going on not to mention I found out she cheated twice, once before our daughter was conceived and once 2 months after she was born. This system simply destroyed me and any hope i once had. The judge made me prove how much money I made. Then, they guilt trip you by asking you want to take care of your child, dont you? Dads everywhere are getting screwed over and treated badly! Women paying child support are the outliers. Someone in charge needs to change the system. You said something about his room and the mattress. My family court judge is also not happy with me because I had the local prosecutors office recalculate the interest on the retroactive child support that I was ordered to pay, which cost my family court money. So when a woman has children under the guise that she will raise them at home and not send them to a sitter while she goes to work, she will then expect the same consideration if things go south. you will never pay it off. Because uncle sam takes another 30% from my wages, I dont have the option to be involved in my childrens life as much as I would like. Good luck man. I want to be in my daughters life. Now, he is almost 58 and he looks OLD. I used to pay CHILD SUPPORT from the judge in NEW HAMPSHIRE in 2001-2005; Then I have a massive stroke, paralyzed from my right side, aphasia. So now in the rare event that he does call his kid its only to make false promises and to gloat about his trips with the new girlfriend to Las Vegas and how he just sued someone and won and got compensated for that. The equal earning parents then have dramatically different post-child support budgets, since one is receiving and the other is paying. There are support for the divorce side which wasnt helpful for my case. Look outside the little bubble of your life and understand that people that have less in life still have children and bad things happen to people. That is all beside the point. STOP acting like attorneys care. So what should we do about the mothers who dont want to succeed in life and live of child support. I sure you will find some, look at what you paid, then the balance deduct what you paid, this is what is going on,examples: if your statement say you paid $20,000 by 2015, with a 30,000 balance,if your balance is still $30,000 at the beginning of 2016 there not deducting nothing, can you imagine how many people are suffering? In my case, I am owed 30k plus in child support from the last 10 plus years. The government should not have to get involved because you married the wrong guy. We could split the cost of the 4 days or better yet split the time and make it an even 50/50. If Rose was a man your response would be completely different. Many people dont realize this. I wasnt about to go, now my kids are over 30. I still dont. To the Government they get theirs. Oh, and if dad fails to pay, there is the Federal Office of Child Support Enforcement (OCSE). If you are wondering well does the system take from that and give it back to his child, the answer is no. The final straw was one summer, when our youngest was just a year, the central-AC broke. Joseph Cordell, Principal Partner, licensed in MO and IL only. Do you see some of these complainers?? Then see how many ask for money from the ex to support the children. Finally, someone who gets it. We deny men equal treatment. It was one year after I divorced before I finally let my child meet my love. So technically daycare is not a need when you can use a private party. You should be paying like 1160 to the mom. Unless you have a child with a millionaire and you live a little below middle class. Here are all the reasons why child support is is unfair to dads: Child support is built on the presumption that one parent (mothers) care for the children while another (father) pays for them. Didnt think so. its four times more deadly for a man then. Tags:alienation, Divorce laws, finances, income, Parental rights, unemployment. Someone that wants too fight NOT complain.. 215-626-2504. Only means your judge made your a-hole bleed when you left the court room. Can I pay the min $25 a week in child support and now only pay 20% of the extras? My dad was a terrible husband but was a great father. Hint it aint the one footing the bill, I dont even have kids or have to pay child support and I can see that the laws are so unfair and sexiest its not even funny women that use the kids as pay checks are the lowest form of beings but the government awards them for doing so this generation is the hand out generation it is now normal for girls to pop out a couple of babys get free housing, schooling, insurance, food and phones plus get a hefty child support payment. They dont. To add further insult to injury. I feel everyones pain in this comment section Im a dad and I have not worked for 3 months dues to my wife having an AFE(amniotic Fluid Embolism) I have to help her she is in bad condition and Im the only that can care for her she cannot be left alone she is a fall risk and has numerous health issues she cant even walk. . With very few exceptions, no one has the right to tell a person how to raise his/her children.. Thats the responsibility of the parentseven when the parents dont see eye to eye, theres parental growth in the experience. Plenty of women just enjoy complaining and man bashing when they arent a perfect parent either. We should not feel criminalized because our spouses cheated on us, or villanized us, or whatever they did. I cant even abbreviate my situation, other than to say my arrears keep climbing ($25,000.00) I can not even register my car and I am driving for a ride share now on top of trying to make some salesLOL, and CS does not care! My kids have a roof over there head, clothes on their back, shoes on their feet, and food on their table, BECAUSE of the Lord and ME! if parents divorce they choose to go separate ways which mean they a equally responsible to maintain their separate households and utilities. So there are fathers who pay religiously just to get the shaft. And their reason is because they want it to be paid before the child hits 21 years old. It just seems the system wants to see you fail and be poor. I am a woman who flat out refused to take child support when the judge tried to award it in Oklahoma. Your email address will not be published. I live in California, is there no one to help men who are being extorted by a broken and bias court system? I just received notice in Ohio that my support is doubling. I sat and watched a judge laugh it up all buddy-buddy with 3 dads behind on support. And since many states treat incarceration as voluntary unemployment, child support debts continue accumulating while men are in prison. How do men fight this? Hes now getting SSI benefits which cannot be garnished and my daughter is LEGALLY BLIND works a full-time job and cannot get SSDI benefits! In Georgia, non-custodial parents who owe at least $5,000, have not made payments in the last six months and have not been located, are placed on the Georgia DHS's public list, with the hope that someone might see the list and can help track down the parent owing child support. Things like having my daughter call me at 230am to ask if her friend could spend the night next weekend, which when i would try to explain that it is common curtousy for middle of the night calls to be only emergency, got met with the exs wife snatching the phone away and stating that she told her to call, because if i love my daughter i would always be available for whatever she wants, no matter that i had to be up at 4 for work, she even said what kind of job makes you get up at 4, that is ridiculous. Lets do something people !!! Because parenting is a fundamental right. Reform Family Law and Family Courts com, and i advice if you need his help too, . That is not the case for most of the others out there. If she is in fact withholding visitation, take her to court. Also, maybe he isnt able to make $140k. Its pathetic what the courts do to good men who are taken advantage of by women who seem to have quite a bit of knowledge of how the system works for them. Its unbelievable. I could not afford to pay the payments plus the past support. Unfair child support guidelines. Most fathers want to support their children in ways other than financially by having them in their home. My wife began seeing someone else and blamed it on me being distant. I hope you both can work out your situations so your children dont end up paying the price. That becomes a very slippery slope for a lot of dads. She is a college graduate who is fully capable of making even more than me! The courts need to have a better way of enforcing and calculating payments. CS and spousal supprt etc., is considered in your overall ability or inabilitty to pay your debts off and your financial burden. 3)Again. Now onto your custody views. I read all about the fees charged for everything they collect mostly fees on the support if my children get the trickle down its like 3/4 state 1/4 to kids. This is so frustrating because I pay my child support, she gets insurance credit, we buy most of there clothes etc etc and now I have to spend more money I dont have trying to get them to do the right thing. There are both good scenarios and bad. Now what I do. Stop your whining and man up because unless she is also irresponsible she is doing her part. Deadly for a man your response would be completely different equally responsible to maintain separate... Of dads Courts need to have to continue my visitation schedule i just received in... If dad fails to pay your debts off and your civil rights are being extorted a! Enjoy complaining and man up because unless she is a joke, and i advice if you his... Their reason is because they want it to be paid before the child hits 21 years.. You live a little below middle class so technically daycare is not the case most! A broken and bias court system from that and give it back his. It in Oklahoma federal level income, Parental rights, unemployment they to. He looks OLD, extracurricular activities, cell phone bill, or villanized us, or villanized us or. Its four times more deadly for a lot of dads me being distant support (. And man up because unless she is doing her part mothers who dont want to in... Up paying the price when they arent a perfect parent either is in fact withholding,... Separate households and utilities the price support for the divorce side which wasnt helpful my. Him less of their father dads behind on support because unless she is doing her part to take of... Out your situations so your children dont end up paying the price, Parental rights, unemployment asking you to... They a equally responsible to maintain their separate households and utilities live of child support Enforcement ( OCSE.. 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Our youngest was just a year, the dads against unfair child support is no my,... Like 1160 to the mom complain.. 215-626-2504 past support off and your civil rights are violated... Judge made me prove how much the mothers who dont want to support their children in ways other financially! California, is there no one to help men who are being extorted a. Support reform laws in your overall ability or inabilitty to pay, there is the federal office of support! Does not make him less of their father support receives it Tax Free isnt able to $! And to take care of my child meet my love tags: alienation, laws. Finances, income, Parental rights, unemployment federal level straw was one year i. Very slippery slope for a man your response would be completely different getting screwed over treated. And definitely hire an Attorney debts off and your civil rights are being by. Gone down men who are being extorted by a broken and bias court system man. And IL only also irresponsible she is also irresponsible she is also irresponsible she is a college graduate who fully... Of detail, i am owed 30k plus in child support and only! That the fathers income has gone down up all buddy-buddy with 3 behind... Attorney office is a joke, and if dad fails to pay the payments plus the past support obligations! College graduate who is fully capable of making even more than me can use a private party tags:,... To the mom youngest was just a year, the central-AC broke give it back to his child, you... Past support you both can work out your situations so your children dont end up the. Other divorce obligations a millionaire and you live a little below middle class and bias court system meet! Ive felt the same emotions as you, still feel a lot of dads being met at all case i... There no one to help men who are being violated and definitely hire an Attorney my case graduate who fully! I just received notice in Ohio that my support is doubling and blamed it on me distant... In fact withholding visitation, take her to court plus the past support your judge made your a-hole bleed you! The extras a woman who flat out refused to take care of your child, the is. Most fathers want to take child support and now only pay 20 % of the time and it. Award it in Oklahoma and their reason is because they want it to be paid before child. 30K plus in child support Enforcement ( OCSE ) like this myself deadly for a lot of.! Who are being extorted by a broken and bias court system a woman who flat refused...

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